Tuesday, March 31, 2015

Day 84 (12/15/14) "Been here long Enough"

Another week down and the start of a new week. 10 days until Christmas. The time seems to have picked up a little. Just looking for it to fly by and look forward to heading home. Had a wonderful visit with my awesome Husband and handsome Son today. It was a great visit ! It was a little sad, because this could be my last visit for a while. We all hugged and shed some tears as we said goodbye this time. I’m planning on being transferred to receiving tomorrow, but I don’t know for sure. My case has been all wrapped up and I have no more court appearances. There is no more reasons for me to stay here any longer. The anticipation is killing me. I’m ready to get this over with. I hate to have to say goodbye and prepare every week. We will see what tomorrow brings. 
Tonight after dinner, one of the girls got released two days early and then an hour later, one of the Mom’s to be, got released. He due date was December 13th. She was holding that baby in, hoping to go home before he was delivered. Her original release date was early April, but her attorney said it could be any time and her time was tonight. That was really good to see. Now she can have her baby. The baby’s Dad can be there, family and friends, and she won’t be away from her baby at all. She will be home with her family, right where she needs to be. It was very exciting ! Everyone was so happy for her. Everything happens for a reason ! I can’t wait to be able to go home to my family. 

Sunday, March 29, 2015

Day 83 (12/14/14) Contraband

Up early today for inspection. I pass every week with flying colors, but this week I get busted for too many emails. I have kept every email I have received since I’ve been in here (178 to be exact). The rule is you can have no more than 20. In the last 12 weeks it has never been an issue, until today. So, I asked the deputy if I can just release them to my Husband, fill out an outgoing property slip and have him pick them up ? I need him to anyhow before I get transferred. She told me “no”. She said that they don’t release property anymore. That didn’t make sense to me, but I wasn’t going to argue. I still passed inspection and she was nice enough to let me go through the ones I wanted to keep, but had to throw the rest away. I was thankful for that because she could have just confiscated it all and tossed it all out. It was a little irritating and frustrating because really they are concerned about too many emails ? What about the drugs being smuggled in here ? The pills being hoarded, the medications being sold. The food being smuggled in from the chow hall. One lady brought back in 8 apples and 6 bags of carrots. She sold half of them. How about the newspaper hoarding ? The contraband and all the extras these women have and hide ? Isn’t that what inspection should be about ? Why in the world would they tell you when the inspection is going to be ? I don’t understand. What’s the point ? It seems like a waste of time. You’re giving the inmates time to hide their extras, food, meds, and contraband. They also call it a hygiene inspection. Basically to insure your cell is clean and you’re not hoarding. Yet, we have an old lady than has been here longer than I have (I have been in this housing unit for 5 weeks). She never leaves her cell, never showers, never exchanges laundry, never cleans, just sits or sleeps on her bed. She comes out for dinner and sometimes for lunch. Everyone avoids her like the plague, yet the deputies don’t do anything about it. She’s failed inspection the past two weeks and they just lock her down. She needs to be moved out of this unit. She’s taking a bed up than could be used for someone who actually wants to program and participate. The inconsistency of the deputies and the rules here, drive me crazy ! I’m hoping today is my last inspection. 

Had a visit this afternoon with my beautiful Daughter and my Dad. My Dad is visiting all the way from Florida for the holidays. t was good to see them both. The visit brightened my day, especially since the Chargers didn’t win today !  Another day down.   

Friday, March 27, 2015

Day 82 (12/13/14) Medical Denied

Had a facility lockdown last night. We got out at 7pm and 35 minutes later, we had to lockdown. I am really tired of this facility and the lockdowns. It’s time for me to go and get my sentence over with. I’ve been waiting to go to receiving for too long. I hope to be leaving in 4 days. 
One of the girls was really upset this morning. She has a brain tumor and needs to have surgery. She’s been waiting over two months for approval to have it done. She just went to the clinic to see the doctor and the doctor didn’t understand why the surgery had not been done or wasn’t at least scheduled. They looked into it and found out the San Diego Sheriff’s Department denied the surgery. They don’t want to have to pay for it, so the doctor has to treat her, because it can’t be ignored. So, he put her on a chemo pill to try and break down the tumor. She was really upset and angry. She has four months on her sentence and needs that surgery. In County Jail, you’re at the mercy of the County. Does the county pay for the surgery or pay the lawsuit if something happens to her because they denied her medical treatment ? 

Interesting info on medical neglect:

  1. Do California inmates have a right to health care?

Inmates have a right to health care under the Eighth Amendment constitutional right against cruel and unusual punishment.
It is not a right to the best possible health care. But it is a right to at least that level of health care that a civilized society would think necessary.
"The United States Constitution does not require that the state provide its inmates with state-of-the-art medical and mental health care, nor does it require that prison conditions be comfortable," wrote one three-judge panel that carefully examined medical conditions in California's prisons.
"California must simply provide care, sufficient to prevent the unnecessary and wanton infliction of pain or death."

Sadly, the CDCR has fallen woefully short of that requirement, resulting in enormous suffering and death:
A significant number of inmates have died as a result of the state's failure to provide constitutionally adequate medical care. As of mid-2005, a California inmate was dying needlessly every six or seven days.

Taken from:


Wednesday, March 25, 2015

Day 81 (12/12/14) "Not much shocks me anymore"

Went to court today. This trips not as enjoyable as the last bus ride. I had AM court and had to leave at 4:40am. I had breakfast, got ready, and walked to transportation. There were 9 women in the holding cell, 3 were sleeping, and 5 were talking away. There were 3 conversations going on. Super loud, it was a freaking hen fest in there. Then some of them were singing (not very well). I couldn’t get out of there or away from them fast enough. We got on the bus, it was packed, and I couldn’t hear the radio. Once we got to the courthouse, it was off to the court holding cell.  There was only 5 of us now, but we got the nasty, dirty girl who was kicking drugs. She asked if she could lean on me to sleep. My answer in my head was “Hell no ! Are you kidding me !? Did you really just ask me that !?” I respond with “No, you can use the wall right there to lean on”, trying to be as nice as possible. Another girl told her she could lay down on the floor. I didn’t care what the hell she did, as long as it was away from me. She just wreaked of sweat, pee, and shit. Coming down from heroin. All the poison coming out of her body. 
After sitting in the holding cell for 2 hours listening to these women’s stories and cases was interesting, sad, and made me angry. I mean, wrong place, wrong time, selling themselves to feed the family, hooked on drugs, bad boyfriend. I’ve seen so much in the past 81 days, it’s crazy. Not much shocks me anymore. I’ve become, as my Husband says, immune to the toughest times, the toughest situations, and tough people. He worries that I will be a changed person. I tell him no way, but he says how can I not be. It will take time to “come back” to my family, but I will. 
I saw the judge and got done in time to make it on the 11am bus and was back to the housing unit. Now, it’s time to prepare and get ready to be transferred to receiving. Sure hope it’s soon. 

It’s amazing how a little tomorrow can make up for a whole lot of yesterday.        

Tuesday, March 24, 2015

Days 79 & 80 (12/10-12/11/14) Repeat Offenders "Frequent Flyer"

Day 79 (12/10/14)

The prison bus came last night. Helen and Piggy got transferred. I was a little down they left, not because I wanted to go with them. But,more of, if they didn’t go, I knew we would all be going the next week. Now it’s a guessing game. I could go next Tuesday, the following Tuesday, or 4 weeks from now. It’s the unknown that drives me crazy. I’m a planner so, this “maybe going” or “maybe not going” is killing me. For security reasons, they don’t tell you when you will be transferred (county to receiving). The prison bus comes on Tuesdays. Sometimes every week, sometimes every other week. You don’t know until that night after 10pm when they have you roll up and transfer you in the middle of the night. The only way my family will know is when I stop calling. It’s hard to have to prepare to say goodbye every week. I am hoping it happens quickly, as to not put myself or my family through the agony and torment of the waiting and guessing. 
Thought of the Day: If you spend your whole life waiting for the storm, you’ll never enjoy the sunshine. 

Day 80 (12/11/14)

Happy Birthday to my Sister ! 
Today’s inspiration comes from my 12 year old Son who emailed me “Don’t Stop Believin’, I will always keep believin’ in you, love Son” I am one lucky and proud Mama to have been blessed with two very amazing and special children ! 

Today is the first day I have seen someone go home and return. One of the ladies in our housing unit went home 4 weeks ago in early November and today she’s back. I know it happens often, but after 80 days, it’s the first time I have seen it. Usually when a “newbie” walks in the door, someone knows them. Whether it’s from the streets or they did time together. Lots of repeat offenders in here or “frequent flyers”. It’s hard for me to comprehend. I never want to come back here. I don’t want to know people as they walk in here. I don’t want to have the menu memorized, know the deputy’s schedules, reminisce about stories from the old jail, or when I went to prison. That’s all I hear about all day long. I wouldn’t be proud to be a “frequent flyer” or a jail “know it all”. That’s what I call them. They think they know everything and anything about jail, prison, and court. Some even try to give legal advice. It's ridiculous and most of it is so exaggerated, wrong, and not true. Just the other morning, one of the “know it alls” was saying how they removed eggs and Chirizo from the menu and believed it to be fact. I was wondering how she found out ? She sleeps half the day and other than meals, she never leaves the housing unit. Well, two days later, we had eggs and Chrizo. So much for being removed from the menu. This is the annoying non-sense I am subjected to on  a daily basis. 

Saturday, March 21, 2015

Day 78 (12/9/14) Co-Dependent Women

My roommate’s friend “Marky”, went home last Friday. She got an email from her last night telling her “hello”, that she was doing good, staying clean, and had not gone to see her dead beat boyfriend. My roommate was very happy and decided to call her today. When she called, she told her she was so glad she didn’t go see that jerk. Marky replies “He’s laying here right next to me”. My roommate was very disappointed. Why is it when men get locked up, the women in their lives stand by their man. But, when a woman gets locked up, in a lot of incidences, the man bails on her, leaving her high and dry. Marky was in here for one month on a probation violation. She had $500 in her bank account, her boyfriend put $100 of her money on her books and blew the other $400. He never sent her one email or answered any of her phone calls. He totally blew her off. But, when he was doing 22 months, she stayed loyal, kept money on his books, and emailed him regularly. What’s wrong with that guy ? Why do women go back after being treated so poorly ? There is a young girl in here pregnant with twins. She’s 19 years old, never been in trouble in her life. She’s in here because of the crimes her boyfriend committed. She was asleep in her boyfriend’s car when he got arrested for burglary, home invasion, and multiple car break ins. She got arrested and charged as an accomplice. She is fighting the charges because she did not commit any of the crimes. Her only crime was her choice in a boyfriend. She received an email from the boyfriend’s Mother, telling her she needs to take part of the rap so her Son does not have to do 10 years. Are you kidding me ? This girl just got smart. She’s done with her boyfriend, got her case severed and will be out of here in two months. She’ll be home to have her babies. She has a good family who supports her. She can’t wait to get home, get a job, and get on with her life. I believe she will make it and she won’t be back. It’s too bad that there aren’t more women like her. Strong and with good family support. I’ve seen too many women get left behind with nothing by their “Old Man” and then just go back to them. Most of them are in here because of the men in their lives. It’s like my old roommate who’s husband had not emailed her, sent her money, or answered her calls in the 8 months she’s been in here. She didn’t know if she wanted to divorce him or maybe try and wake it work. I think they need classes and programs designed to help women be strong and independent, find an inner strength to be successful on their own without a man in their lives. I think if the system could help them more upon release, they would have more options than going back to their “Old Man”. It’s hard to see and hear. Makes me that more thankful for my wonderful Husband who supports, loves, and adores me. I am so very lucky. My Husband always told me, it’s not easy to be a good man, but life isn’t easy. The easy road isn’t always the correct road. You find the love of your life, you treat her like a Queen and you give her all of you. I am very grateful for him. 

Thursday, March 19, 2015

Day 77 (12/8/14) 50 women with 50 different personalities

It’s Monday, a start of a new week. I feel like it’s going to be a good week. 
Thought of the day: Sometimes you have to let things go, so there is room for better things to come into your life. 

We had a few tiffs today. Fights over the TV, the newspaper, and cleaning. With 50 women and so many personalities, we are never going to always get along. The morning started off with two roommates fighting over when to clean their cell. One of the girls sleeps until lunch everyday and the other is up early. Well, the early bird likes to clean before lunch, but cant because her roomie is always sleeping. So, she waits to clean after lunch. The resentment of not being able to clean when she wants, has to be building up and today, she hit her breaking point. She decides she’ll clean when she wants to, so she goes in and starts cleaning. She wakes up her roommate in the process and they get into a screaming match. The early bird gets mad and wants to switch rooms. But, the grass isn’t always greener and she realizes that moving isn’t a smart move, so she backs off and doesn’t clean the room. But, she’s still mad and as she stews about it complaining to everyone that will listen, she decides “Screw it, I’ll do what I want to do and I’m cleaning now”. Then round 2 started up. They eventually cleaned their cell and by the end of the day, they had squashed their fight. 
The newspaper is a daily fight. We have people grab the newspaper and take it into their cells before anyone has read it. Then there’s “Butter”, who usually gets the paper first, let’s no one read it until she’s done and she keeps the sudoku puzzle section all day while she works on it. This really pisses people off. Now, we have “Crazy Donna” (who was transferred here from Patton State Mental Hospital) who interrogates everyone about the paper if she can’t find it to read it and once she gets it, she guards it with her life. She won’t share and she hoards it in her cell. She was reading the comics and hoarding the local section, so a woman asked to read the locals and she refused. She was “reading it”. But, she wasn’t reading it, so they argued about it. The woman attempted to pry the newspaper out of “Crazy Donna’s” hands. No luck. She left extremely frustrated. 

The TV channel selection is usually a “majority rules” selection. But, some deputies will not change the channel if people are in the middle of watching something. That’s what happened tonight. The deputy turned on the TV and Storage Wars was on. Two women sat down to watch and the deputy wouldn’t change it. So, many inmates kept complaining the entire time. “Are we really watching this ? I can’t believe someone is watching this”. Blah, blah, blah. I actually like the show and didn’t mind watching it. Plus, it was something different for a change. The thing is, the two women were nice and said you can change it at 8pm after the episode they were watching was over. Because, it was a marathon on and the deputy wouldn't change the channel if they were watching the show, they could have manipulated the TV programming all night, but they didn’t. If I don’t like what’s on TV, I’ll read a book. It’s not worth the energy getting worked up about it. The only problem I have with the TV is the women that yell “TV courtesy” when they are watching their show, but if it’s not what they want to watch and they’re not watching TV, “they” have no courtesy and get loud. It’s very irritating, selfish, and rude. I look forward to the day I’m home and I’m watching my own TV. What I want to watch, when I want to watch it, at the volume I want, and to be able to fast forward, rewind, pause, and rewind. :) 

Tuesday, March 17, 2015

Day 76 (12/7/14) "It could always be worse"

What a weekend, and I’m not talking about a great weekend either. This weekend was very frustrating. It started with Friday. Our current deputy is not that great, she seems miserable, she is constantly annoyed, she won’t change the channel on the tv, she won’t put the volume up, she won’t let us use the mop, she is irritable and easily annoyed, and we are on day 3 of her 5 day schedule. So, this afternoon, she didn’t let us out until 2pm and she forgot to let everyone out for school at 1pm. It was really ridiculous. Then our night deputy decides to split the tiers and only let us out for an hour and 15 minutes. What the heck !? Her reason was “this is how I’m doing it, don’t bother me about it.” The night just sucked. Saturday during the day was alright, but then we had another night deputy split the tiers again. The only good thing about Saturday night was my visit with my family. I’m very thankful for that visit. We laughed and had a good time. Then Sunday rolled around. I was so happy it was the deputy’s last day. Everyone is ready for her to be gone. She woke us up at 6:15am for inspection and we had 15 minutes to get ready. If we weren’t ready when she got to our cell, it was an automatic fail. She took 2 1/2 hours to complete the inspection. 3 cells automatically failed for not getting up and out of bed and 2 cells failed for attempting to sneak extras out of their cells. So, a total of 5 cells got 24 hour lockdown. She finally let us out at 10 minutes after 9am. I’m just thankful I got in a shower, because 40 minutes later at 9:50am, she was locking us down before lunch. 

In the afternoon, I had another great visit ! My Mom and two Sisters came. We sat outside and had a really nice time. It was so nice to see them and give them a hug. 

Then we got put on facility lockdown at 3:45pm. We locked down and then the deputy scanned us. So, it was a waiting game. 45 minutes later, we get to go to dinner, thank goodness. I needed that walk to the chow hall. I was getting so upset and anxious about the lockdown. On the way out to dinner, the deputy scanned us again. I was wondering, did the lose an inmate ? Well, it was nice to have dinner at 5pm rather than 3:45-4pm. By the time we got back, we only had an hour and a half until our evening time, so I sat down and wrote some letters. Then our night deputy was handing out mail and announced we were still on lockdown and once it was removed, she would let us out. That was a disappointing announcement. I just sat down and continued to write, hoping for a slight chance we would get out. When she came to our cell for meds, I asked what time it was. She said 7:40pm. At least I had a good book to read, because it was looking to be a long night. Shortly there after, the sound of cell doors opening was heard. It was music to my ears. It’s sad when that’s the sound you look forward to hearing every day. I jumped up, but only the bottom tier got let out. I’m thinking “Really ? This crap again ?” Not a minute later, she let the top tier out. Thank goodness ! We were able to salvage the night and enjoy 2 hours out. Whenever I have to deal with this bullshit, I get frustrated and irritated with the inconsistencies and pettiness of the jail’s crap. But, I remind myself, it could always be worse. I could be in the C housing unit. Their entire dorm failed inspection and the entire dorm is on a 48 hour lockdown. The rumor is, she failed them all because everyone had 2 pairs of socks, but we are allowed two pairs of socks, so I can’t believe that’s the reason. Whatever the reason is, it’s just another reminder that it could always be worse. I am just glad this week is over. I’m ready to start a new week with a clean slate. 

Sunday, March 15, 2015

Day 73 (12/4/14) "She was on 4 different meds"

Well, my roommate actually listened to me and took my advice instead of nagging the deputies and complaining non-stop. She’s just documenting the things she feels is not right or justified. She seems to have taken it down a notch. I’m glad to see the change. I think a combination of her Father passing away and the meds they had her on made her very aggressive and hostile. She finally saw the Psychiatrist yesterday and got her meds changed. She was on 4 different meds during the day and night. Now, she’s on 1 in the morning and 2 at night. I am already seeing an improvement. It’s sad that all they do here is drug people up. There is no other help or treatment. She lost her Dad, why don’t they have a grief counselor ? Why isn’t there group counseling. Less on meds, more on therapy and treatment for the mentally ill. I mean, I would like to participate in counseling or a group counseling to deal with being in here, my actions, and how to understand the impact on my family. I think jail should build a housing unit for those that need mental health services. Services not containment. You can’t tell me there isn’t any money. Between Securus, JPay, and Global Tel Link, there’s plenty ! Anyway, Right now, psych ward is a bunch of one man cells with 24/7 lockdown. The psychiatrist comes 1-2 times a month. So, you’re treatment is lockdown and meds. They need a unit that is based around treatment, therapy, and counseling. Bring psych interns from local colleges to run groups to save money. This unit would have deputies to insure safety, but trained staff that know how to deal and treat the mentally ill. A lot of women could benefit from this and possibly succeed when they get out. Part of the program would be a “pre-release” class. So that these women continue their treatment, have a place to live, and some assistance with food, clothes, finding a job, medication and so on. We need to find a better way to re-enter them into our communities other than handing them a trolley token and putting them back on the streets. 

The rain has stopped and the clouds have cleared. The sun is out. We got to walk to the chow hall for dinner. How I missed that walk the last couple of days. After dinner, before we locked down, they were bringing the drug sniffing dog to housing C. I’m sure they are looking for anything leftover from Saturday nights raid. Just another night at Las Colinas Detention. 

Thursday, March 12, 2015

Day 72 (12/3/14) This is Jail, not a resort"

It’s been raining the last 2 days, so we are on a rainy day schedule. Basically, no walking to the chow hall. All our meals are brought to our housing unit. For breakfast, it’s not too bad at all, you get you breakfast and go right right back to sleep. I miss the walk outside for lunch and dinner. Other than having to stay in all day, nothing else has changed. So, it’s not bad and we need the rain and it’s supposed to clear up by the weekend. 
My roommate’s lockdown is over today, thank goodness. She’s starting to drive me crazy ! At least I can go in and out of my cell and don’t have to wait for the deputy to let me out. I’m not sure if she learned her lesson, because this morning she starts in about how she never heard back on her grievance she filed on the deputy who was mean to the old lady. It’s been past the seven days they have to respond. “I’m going to file another grievance” she says. I said to her “Do you think that’s really a good idea ? You’re in jail, this is not the time or place to “fight the fight”, especially on a minor incident. This is jail, not a resort, you’re going to get “bitch” deputies and you need to learn to deal with it and accept it. They want you to engage, so they can write you up and screw you. You have to be smarter than that. I’m not saying it’s right and I don’t agree with it, but they have the power right now. If you want to do something, document it and complain after you are no longer behind these walls. You can have an easy stay or a hard stay, it’s up to you and your actions”. She actually listened and I hope I got through to her. Only time will tell. I’m leaving in a few weeks and she’ll be on her own. She controls her own destiny and how the remainder of her stay will go. 

She has decided to stay awake today and if I have to hear the story of her Mexican Pack one more time, my head might explode ! She just won’t shut up. She is on my last nerve. One of the women going up to prison told me this afternoon, “When we get on the bus, keep your roommate away from me, I can’t handle her”. I laughed and said “Don’t worry, she’s not going up to prison with us, she’s doing a local prison term here”. She said “Thank goodness, I feel for you hearing that same story over and over again “!

I just laughed and agreed. It’s usually not too bad, because she sleeps all the time, but the last two days she’s been awake with her mouth running non-stop. Driving me bonkers ! What's sucks is, this is my life now. These are the things that I worry about now. I have no life. Junior High School all over again. I don't think about what I needed to get done at work, bills, getting my kids ready for the day, what's for dinner, groceries. Real life. Just another thing I should have thought about. The guilt I feel for my Husband and kids is now my reality. You get caught up in the BS here, but when things get quiet, your mind will remind you of what you have done and left behind. 

Monday, March 9, 2015

Day 71 (12/2/14) This has been building up

My roommate flipped out last night and got herself in lockdown and it’s a real pain in the ass for me. Last night we had commissary delivery. My roommate’s Mom had ordered her a Mexican pack (you go online and order gift packs). They are usually delivered the next day, well her Mom ordered it on Wednesday before Thanksgiving. Commissary was closed for 4 days because of the long holiday weekend, so no deliveries. She was upset about it, so what can you do ? She was expecting it on Monday, but it didn’t show up, When the commissary guy came back to drop something off,  she approached him about it. I could hear her getting loud and hostile. She cursed at him and then stormed off. Then she turned around and yelled loudly to the deputy “Fuck you bitch” ! Then proceeded to flip her off and then stormed into her cell (my cell too), and shut the door. She was in lockdown the rest of the night. It was not a smart move and now I’m locked out of my cell the rest of the evening. Before lockdown, she gets her write up and has to wait for the Sergeant to come and talk to her and give her her punishment. Of course at 10pm, when we have lockdown, I have to hear all about it. But, the thing is, this is jail. You can’t act like that, because it gets you nowhere. She wanted to be an inmate worker, but a write up is an automatic 30 day waiting period before you can re-apply and the write up can prevent you from being selected. The Sergeant showed up at 2:20am to talk to her. Her punishment, 1 day lockdown and 2 weeks no contact visits. She was mad, but she did it to herself. This has been building for weeks. I have talked her off the ledge numerous times, but she finally snapped. She is lucky, because she could have easily been sent to housing F for what she pulled and if she does it again, she will be sent there. She has 11 months to go, she needs to calm herself. I was not stuck in lockdown, but had to wait for the deputy to let me out separately. I couldn’t go back in once I was out. So, that was a pain in the ass. It was really irritating all day long, because I didn’t do anything, but get stuck with a “hot headed nutcase” for a roommate. She knew I was annoyed and kept apologizing and promising to never do it again. I told her it was fine, but if she did it again, I was kicking her out. I hope she learned her lesson ! Things can really get to you in here. They do build up and you want to explode. If you have no access to any kind of way to blow off steam or just don't want to, it will eventually happen. 

Sunday, March 8, 2015

Day 70 (12/1/14) "Beauty Queens and Dirty Birds"

It is a beginning of a new month. I have been here 10 weeks. The last 70 days I have been in two housings, 4 different cells, I’ve had eight cellmates, I have read 14 books, received 160 emails, 13 postcards, I’ve walked to the chow hall 63 times, and have eaten 9 pieces of chocolate cake. 

We had laundry exchange today and the only sizes left for pants were small, medium, or 3X. They were out of large, XL, XXL, really ? Supposedly they didn’t have enough time to stock their cart. I usually wear a large so, my choices were medium or 3X. I couldn’t take the 3X as 3 of me could fit in them. So, I had to take the medium. The mediums fit, but they are tight and I’m not looking to wear “skinny jeans” in jail ! I want to be comfortable, not trying to look good. My Husband is at home, I have no one here to try and look good for. I wear no make up, I traded my contacts for glasses, and my hair is in a bun or a pony tail every day. I don’t care, there is no one to impress. I shower everyday, brush my teeth, brush my hair, I have excellent hygiene. I just have no desire to get “dolled” up in here. There are women who do. They wear eyeliner, mascara, they do their hair all up and fancy every day. They make their own colored eyeliner using colored pencils. I guess if you are going to be here a while, you do it to feel normal and to feel good. I can’t judge or complain, at least they take care of themselves. We have the “beauty queens” and then we have the “dirty birds”. The women who don’t shower, don’t brush their teeth, don’t brush their hair, and smell really bad. No one wants to be roommates with them. No one wants to sit by them on chow hall. Please do not sit by my while I’m watching TV if you don’t shower. No one wants to smell you. The women in here don’t like it when you don’t have basic hygiene. Some will tell you straight out that you need to shower, others will announce that the showers are free and that there is  shampoo and soap, please use it ! 

I have been lucky enough to have clean roommates and I just try to stay away from the “dirty birds”. Another day down. 

Thursday, March 5, 2015

Day 69 (11/30/14) "Gay while you Stay"

It’s Sunday and the end of another month. Got a lot of exercise in this morning to make up for the lack of exercise Saturday. Got to watch the Chargers pull out a 4th Qtr win in the last minutes of the game. I enjoyed the sun during patio time for an hour, talked to my family this evening, and watched a movie. Today was a good day. Went by fast and another month down ! 
It was a pretty quiet day. Everyone was busy talking and speculating on the bust in housing C. Everyone was trying to figure out how many got busted and who got rolled out. We didn’t realize that someone in our own housing got rolled out. Two girls got written up, separated, and one day lockdown for “homosexing”. That was what was put on the write up. I always thought their relationship was strange. They were inseparable. They really never came out of their cells much. Only for lunch, dinner, and in the evenings. I never saw them without the other. But, I never thought much of it, because, one of the girls was married, has 13 year old twin boys, and a two year old daughter. During the night checks (the deputies do walk through's every hour of all the cells), the deputy caught them twice in the same bed. I don’t know the exact details, but of course the rumors and various stories are they were just laying in bed together, just rubbing their backs, to the extreme of they got caught having sex. Who knows what exactly happened in their cell. But, something went down, because they moved one to C housing unit, got a write up and one day lockdown. The girl that is still in our housing unit says it was no big deal and nothing happened. She keeps joking about her write up for “homosexing”. They are pretty strict and always watching, so it’s hard to really be having sex in this place, but I’m sure they try. It can get very lonely in here. People look for any type of "companionship". For some of the women that never have visits and not much contact, it has to be rough. It's rough for me and I am fortunate it enough to have the contact with my Husband. I miss him constantly. So, I guess I can understand some of the things that go on in here, well sort of.  This was the first time I had ever heard the phrase "Gay while you Stay". Yes, it does happen. Another day of prison education. 

Tuesday, March 3, 2015

Day 68 (11/29/14) Hidden in a latex glove and fell out

It’s Saturday, today went by pretty quick and I wasn’t as bored as yesterday. I also had my visit tonight. So, I'm sure that helped me day out. My visit was incredible as usual. My Husband and both kids came to see me and we had a really great time ! It made my night. Our deputy today was super cool. I enjoyed 3 hours of criminal minds this morning, then after lunch I had a very hot shower. When the water is hot, the showers are very nice. But, we always don’t get hot showers. There are times when it’s barely luke warm and there are times it starts out warm but turns cold while you’re showering. I have figured out the best times to get hot showers, so I’m pretty lucky. It pays not to sleep all day long. Like they say “The early bird gets the worm” and the hot shower.
After my shower, I went down to watch tv, but the deputy was playing the jail orientation video. The video is incredibly boring and really needs to be updated. It’s really not good at all. Once that was finally over, we watched tv, but the girls playing cards changed the channel. Myself and another girl was not having it. They are playing cards and not even watching tv and no one wanted to watch a movie that was half way over. So, we asked the deputy to change it. Then the crying and complaining started. Usually I don’t care, if something good is on, I’ll watch it, if not, I’ll read. I don’t get worked up about it, but today, I wasn’t putting up with their crybaby BS. They weren’t even watching tv, so we told them “You’re playing cards, we are watching tv, so we get to decide the program.” We watched Storage Wars and I just ignored there bitching. They are grown women, act like it. Instead they act like a two year old throwing a tantrum because they didn’t get their way. These women (well 80%) are very childish and extremely annoying. None of them are worth the time and effort to fight or argue. I just ignore them. I don’t need their negative energy around me. 
We got late night, so we were out until 11pm, but after we locked down, the excitement didn’t end. The “C” housing unit that connected to ours, had drugs in their unit and around midnight, the deputies raided their cells and brought the girls into our housing unit to strip search them. They used our “multi-purpose” room, I’m sure it was to split them up. I heard it was 6-7 girls that got searched and 2-3 of them got rolled out. One for sure was caught with heroin. It was hidden in a latex glove and fell out of her when she had to squat and cough. I’m not sure how they got it into the unit. I was wondering if it was from their contact visits. Because “C” housing has visits before us on Saturday evenings. My bunkie heard someone snuck it in through booking. When she was in school on Wednesday, she heard someone rolled in with it. I had heard rumors that there were drugs in the 3-A,B,C, and D housing units, but I had not seen any. Guess they occasionally get in here, but they eventually get caught. I heard about a raid that happened in “F” about a week before I arrived back in September on a girl who had gotten crystal meth in there. But, they busted her. Right before I transferred into this new housing unit, there was a girl on a 10 day lockdown. I finally had to ask her how do you get a 10 day lockdown ? Well, I guess she got caught trying to smuggle in heroin in here through a contact visit. 

Drugs may be a lucrative business, but it’s a very risky one. Just when I thought it was getting boring around here. If it’s not one thing, it’s another. 

Sunday, March 1, 2015

Day 67 (11/28/14) Phones and Video Visit Ripoff

Happy Black Friday. It’s 4am and while all the shoppers are out and about, we are having breakfast in our cells. As we are still on lockdown. This lockdown and being understaffed really sucks. I hope I am not here (Las Colinas) for Christmas. Even the girls who had video visits scheduled last night on Thanksgiving, they got cancelled. They wouldn't even let them out of their cell for a 30 minute video visit. That was a little extreme. You don’t even leave the housing unit. Both of the women that had video visits have family that are out of town that had paid for their video visits already. Now they have to try and get are refund from the company. Good luck with that. Securus, the company they use for the video visits and phones are horrible and totally rob inmates and their families blind. I guarantee the fine print says there are no refunds for cancelled video visits. So, you’re out of your $19.95. Also, all the money you have on your phone account when you’re released is non-refundable. That is ridiculous and down right criminal. So, if your family puts $50 on your phone account and you have $40 left when you leave, Securus keeps every dime. Then, the worst scam is the phones “reset”. You are on the phone and all of a sudden the phones shutoff and you have to wait for them to reset. Once they reset, you call back and get charged your $.60 for the first minute. So, you’re getting double charged. Local calls are $.60 for the first minute and $.25 every minute after. This happens multiple times a day. They are making a killing just on the “resetting” of the phones. Your max time for one phone call is 30 minutes, which is $7.85 per phone call. There have been numerous complaints about the time calculated on the phone for inmates. I believe I have been overcharged numerous times and there is no way to get a copy of your calls and charges. That is not right at all. I have requested copies, my Sister has gone to their website to request it, but nothing. I’ve even asked the jail to provide me a copy of my phone records and they just ignored my request. It’s not right, you should be able to get a copy of what you are paying for. Date, time, phone number called, how many minutes, charge per minute, and total billed. All the calls are recorded, so it’s possible to get records. It’s a phone company and service the jail uses, as a private phone company, you have to be required to provide billing information to your customers. Just because we are in jail, they take full advantage to overcharge and rip us (and our families) off, because we have no options. When I get home, I’ll be looking into this much deeper. 
Friday was very uneventful and boring. We were at least back to full staff and our regular program, no more lockdown. I am tired of being so bored. I really need more to do with my time. I am up at 6:30am and go to bed at 10:30pm. That’s 15.5 hours to occupy and my options are slim on what I can do. Another day down.