It’s been exactly 4 weeks since my arrival at this fine establishment. In the last 4 weeks, I have had 5 roommates, stayed in 3 different cells, read 7 books, had 4 inspections, 7 visits. I have made 48 phone calls, written over 40 letters, consumed 7 bananas, I have spent $240 on phone time, been through 2 facility lockdowns, bought 20 stamped envelopes, and 8 postcards. I have made 15 inmate requests, received 62 emails, and have spent 556 hours in lockdown (out of 696 total hours).
It’s been a long and difficult month. But, I made it ! I have had a roller coaster ride of emotions over the last 4 weeks. Highs, lows, extreme lows, sadness, anger, hopelessness, loneliness, guilt, and desperation. But, in the end, I made it. I was able to push through it all. All thanks to my wonderful family. Their love and support along the way is amazing and every time I was down, they were always there to pick me up.
I am also thankful for the 5 roommates I’ve had so far on this journey. They have each touched me in their own way and I will never forget any of them. Each one always had compassion and support for me whenever I was down. Though they had their flaws, quirks, and drove me crazy sometimes, they are good women deep down inside. Like myself, who made a mistake, they deserve a second chance. I hope that when they leave here, they will find that second chance and turn their lives around. I wish them the best, they deserve it.
I have found this new inner strength and I am keeping it together more. Starting to feel good inside again. I refuse to be lost in the system and forgotten. I refuse to let this bring me down. I know I have so much to offer and my family is counting on me. So, I am determined to stay focused and strong through all this. Before I was sentenced. I bought myself this inspirational card to send myself while I was locked up. My Husband emailed it to me and I read it every morning to give me the strength to make it yet another day.
A New Start
The page once written has been read, the chapter closed and done.
Time now to leave behind regret and walk out towards the Sun.
It rises to another day, that’s brighter than the last.
Leave all bitterness behind, you have divorced the past.
Be positive about your life, the changes you’ve been through.
In turn you’ll come to recognize, you’ve found the stronger you.